Category: Uncategorized

27 Nov 2019

The Success Loop

I wanted to share The Success Loop with you. I learned it from my mentor Dean Graziosi. It has had a profound impact on me and my business.

I think it would take to long for me to write it all out so I’m giving you the link to my podcast training on it. http://bullyproofingu.com/podcasts/the-success-loop/

Let me know how you use the Success Loop and the difference it has made in your life.

Have a blessed and wonderful Thanksgiving,

24 Oct 2019

Something’s Wrong With My Baby

At ten months old, I was admitted to Magic Valley Memorial Hospital in Twin Falls, ID just days after Dr. John McKain said with a slow, lazy smile to my mother, “I think you’re just being a nervous mom, but we’ll check it out.” Every time I was laid on my left side or back, I cried and turned blue.

He took me in his arms and walked me back to the x-ray department. I like to think he chuckled and talked to me. I imagine him saying, “You cute little thing. I bet you’re spoiled, aren’t you? You just like to be held and cuddled. That’s all well and good until you have to grow up. It’s better to just let you cry. It develops your lung capacity.”

He laid me on the cold, hard table on my back so they could get a clear shot of my chest cavity. I started crying, then I started turning blue.

When the x-ray was read, a Malignant Mesenchymosarcoma, one of the rarest forms of cancer, was discovered. A mushroom shaped growth was on the inside of my left rib cage, advancing toward my lungs, diminishing my capacity to breathe. When I sat up or lay on my right side, my lungs would fall away from the cancer and I could get the breath I needed to sustain my life.

Babies are very good at asking for what they need, but the problem is all they know how to do is cry. When I couldn’t get enough air in my lungs, I just hollered, which caused even more problems because I had less air. However, it also brought someone to pick me up, thereby restoring my lung capacity, air flow, and happiness. A happy baby creates more happiness.

They admitted me to the hospital, cut me from my sternum to my spine, and removed the cancer. Then they put a mesh in to give my ribs more stability and structure. I had to have follow up visits with the medical personnel to make sure I was healing, growing, and prospering in the best way possible.

The doctor asked my mom if they could share my medical records with others around the world, informing her that my case’s information would help save the lives of other infants.

Taming the Bully Between Your Ears is in many ways like that surgery. Not unlike my rare cancer, we all have a bully that lives in our heads and stops us from reaching our full capacity. We have settled for less than greatness. Many have given up, and some just complain. Others paint themselves blue because they don’t want to be part of the human race, so they dress up and pretend to be superheroes, aliens, and animals. Some have gone silent. Some die.

The problem is we have been conditioned by society that all of these tragedies are okay. We have learned to accept mediocrity and pain. We are suffering the effects of a bully cancer. Recent studies have shown that 80% of Americans don’t like their job. Divorce is so common that finding someone who hasn’t been through at least one is almost impossible. Suicide is on the rise in epidemic proportions everywhere. It strikes all ages, genders, and socioeconomic groups.

Our internalized bullies are stealing our dreams and lives. I will help you cut the bully cancer out. I can provide you with the help and support you need so you can reach your full capacity. My program will tell you what to put into your marvelous mind so you can heal, grow, and create your dream life.

You can then share your story with others. You can save lives with your experiences. You can uplift and empower all because you didn’t let the nasty little voice in your head stop you. Others may slow you down, but only you can stop you permanently.

It’s time to Tame the Bully Between Your Ears. It’s time to stop accepting things as they are and be the change in the world for others to learn from. Change is great. It happens anyway, so you might as well use it to make things better. Stop watching made-up characters on TV and in the movies and become your own best friend and superhero.

Everyone has potential, but. my question to you is, what are you doing with yours? It’s time to learn from your past and create your future. Just getting by is not good enough for you, your family, or your friends. To change the world one person at a time, you must start with yourself, then reach back and help others.

Let your dreams pull you into your future. Let your vision empower you.

It is much easier to help someone with a hand up than to try and push or carry them.

I invite you to shine.

I invite you to Tame the Bully Between Your Ears and go forth like you never have before.

Join me and the thousands of others that are changing our world by managing our thoughts.

22 Sep 2019

Was It A Bully Hummingbird?

Have you ever seen a hummingbird with scarcity thinking? I have or at least I think I have. I don’t really speak hummingbird so I could be wrong.

The other morning, I was relaxing in my hot tub which is located in my back yard enjoying the incredible sunrise. It’s so peaceful which allows my creative juices to flow.

I had just finished my third book and sent it to the editors so it was celebration, contemplation time.

I heard the faint sound of whirring wings and looked over at the hummingbird feeders. A tiny female was enjoying a sugary breakfast. All of a sudden, I saw a flash of movement as another hummingbird raced onto the seen with crazy chittering and chased the first bird off.

I expected the second hummingbird to return to the feeder to drink. She didn’t.

I thought, she’s a bully. It seemed to fit. I’m just saying.

The bully hummingbird proceeded to chase and challenge. Never getting anything herself. I started thinking.

I applied my usual question to her; “Why would a reasonable rational person (hummingbird in this case) behave this way?”

I applied my years of expertise working with people to help them bully proof themselves. I realized, if she was human, she just might be thinking, “There’s not enough! I have to get mine first or there won’t be any for me.” So, she acted on that belief. She chased and bullied others thinking it would help her.

I never did see her get a drink. The other hummingbirds did. They would come back and drink as she was chasing someone else. Getting what they could until she rapidly returned to start the chase all over again.

There are so many teaching points I could identify here but I want to share just three.

  1. Hurt people hurt people or in this case hummingbirds. When we focus on limiting beliefs, we become more limited. We are more likely to lash out and try to grab what we think is our fair share. Never thinking of the consequences of our actions because the pain and fear is overwhelming and when emotion is high intelligence is low. Even for hummingbirds it would seem.
  2. When I try to control others, I lose control of myself. I chase all over draining and depleting my resources. Without resources, my business dies. I die. I’m in business to help and serve others and if I let that die, I’m doing them a disservice. I need to apply my assets to expanding so I can assist more people.
  3. Others are watching. The world is full of cameras and eyes and you never know who you’re going to see or who is going to see you. One act of bad behavior due to your emotional cup being full and overflowing can cost you everything.

The world is full of emotional people behaving badly and they’re not just hurting themselves but many others around them. There is hope. Managing your emotions is easy once you learn how. It’s not your fault. You might never have learned how to do it or maybe you knew how at one point but forgot about it. Emotional management is needed daily. Just like going to the gym. It’s not a one and done kind of thing.

The best why I have found to manage my emotions is to deal with them as they happen or during scheduled time. I use a tool I like to call write and burn.

Step 1. Grab a piece of paper.

Step 2. Divide it down the middle.

Step 3. Put I feel __________ because … on the left side. Fill in the blank with the negative emotion you are feeling.

Step 4. Write out why you feel angry, sad, depressed, frustrated, disappointed, crunchy, ticked off, embarrassed, hurt, etc. whatever it was you wrote in the blank.

Step 5. Tear it off and burn it, shred it, just get rid of it. My preference is burning. I like watching it burn up and turn to ash. Audible sigh of contentment here.

Step 6. On the other half of the paper begin with I feel __________ because … and now write out all of your positive feelings. Some examples are grateful, happy, excited, joyful, loved, special, strong, sexy, contented, etc.

Step 7. Keep the right side.

Step 8. Read it often. I keep them for a week so I’m reading seven positive lists at a time.

I use this tool to help me deal with my negative emotions appropriately so I don’t allow my pain to overflow on others. If more people were emptying their emotional cups more often, we wouldn’t have so many outbreaks of violence.

I invite you to start using this tool to improve and upgrade your life. I know you’ll love it so much you’ll want to share it with others. Please do.

Let’s change the world. Together we are strong. Please stand with me in managing your emotions so we can leave the world a little better every day.

Have a blessed day my friends.

28 Jul 2019

Black Lives Don’t Matter More

It’s not about the color of the skin. It’s not about the color of our hair. It’s about the heart. It’s about our soul.

One life does not matter more than another. All lives matter. Weather it’s young or old, black or white, male or female. We all matter. We all have a purpose.

It’s about making the world a better place. It’s about the fact that hurt people hurt people and we need to start the healing.

It’s about a hand up not a hand out. Let’s uplift and empower each other. It’s about bringing love and acceptance to all.

The next time you walk into a room let your smile lead the way. My wish for you is that people will say, “I like me best when I’m with you.” Give your love. Give your time.

The next time you walk past some trash on the ground pick it up and throw it away in a trash receptacle.

The next time you walk by a person smile and give them words of encouragement. Lift them up.

At work, do what needs to be done not just the minimum you can and still get paid. Look around and see how you can improve things. Give from your heart not your wallet.

Hurt people hurt people and healed people heal people. We must start the healing now or our world will explode in violence, abuse, shame, guilt, and fear will rule our lives instead of love, honor, and peace.

We need to be the change we wish to see in the world. Stewardship starts with us.

I invite you to tame your inner bully so we can tame the outer ones and help the world heal.

Have a blessed day,

19 Jun 2019

How Clouds Changed My Perspective

It’s great to be with you again My Friend,

Have you ever been cast into darkness when you didn’t expect it? Yeah, Me too.

These last few days I have had the privilege of waking up between 3:15 am and 4:00 am. I say privilege because I didn’t realize how much it would impact my days and my perspective.

You see that early in the morning you get to experience things you don’t at other times. Most people are still sleeping. It’s quiet, peaceful, and a great time for introspection and growth.

Yesterday we also had a full moon. As I set on my back porch gazing at it the past few days, I have gained a knowledge I want to share with you. (If you want to hear more about it, you can go to my podcast on iTunes and check it out. Or my website.)

With the light from the full moon shining down and a lamp, I was able to write in my journal. It was so calming and relaxing I was able to dive deep into my feelings and gain new insight. All of a sudden, I was plunged into darkness. The little flicker of light from my oil lamp was not enough for me to see.

I looked up and saw that clouds had floated between me and the moon blocking the light. Then it struck me. People are just like that.

Some people bring the light when they enter the room and others darkness. Which one are you?

I’m thinking you’re the kind of person that brings the light. Why because you seek out good things. You’re reading this positive and uplifting blog which means you search for powerful inspiration to guide and direct you. That means you bring the light.

I am willing to bet that people say, “I like being around you. I like me best when I’m with you.” You bring the light to others.

Thank you. Keep doing it. We need more light bearers. There are many dark places to put them in.

I invite you to let your light shine even brighter today and every day. I invite you to bring sunshine and happiness to your workplace, community, and home.

Just for today let’s light the world with love. We can do anything for a day. If you like how it makes you feel, I invite you to do it again tomorrow and maybe even the next day.

Remember who you are makes a difference. It could be positive or negative. You decide.

Now, go have an off the chart’s day my friend.

10 May 2019

Did someone say a birthday party?

It’s my husband’s birthday today. He’ll be 53. He’s a happy man.

I don’t know why so many people have a problem with getting older or telling their age. First of all, it’s just a number. Second of all, it’s better than being dead.

I love getting older. I enjoy life more all the time. I learn new things and get to implement them. I have learned enough that I am an expert at somethings and can hire people to do the things I’m not good at or don’t want to do.

I enjoy working out and staying fit and healthy. I am committed to staying with it and making it a priority. It use to be. Then I allowed myself to fall into the thought process that I was getting older and it was alright to be out of shape. No, it is not. Not for me; not any more.

It is not okay to have a little stomach in my way when I try to tie my shoes. It is not okay to be sore and tired after I mow the lawn. I’m better than that. I can do more than that.

I’m at one and a half months of my lifestyle and eating upgrade. I don’t know if you saw any of my Facebook lives chronicling my journey or not. I’m so glad I got started because now I am reaping the rewards of my work. I’m also glad I’m staying committed.

I see the people in the gym who never stopped going and I remind myself that could have been me and I keep going. I use it as motivation to fuel my workout. I know I can get better. I already am.

What have you let go in your life that you know you should be doing? I invite you to get back to it. Stop making excuses and just make the needed change. You’ll reap so many rewards you’ll be glad you did.

Have a blessed day,

19 Apr 2019

Easter Weekend Ripples

The word bullying brings up many different images depending on your experience with it. You may see a particular face or hear a voice. You may feel emotions that cause you pain. Maybe you were the bully and you feel remorse and shame. Either way the word affects you.

I have worked with people who were bullied and years later it is still affecting them. I have helped people and in a moment watched them transform right before my eyes.

Nothing has meaning except the meaning you give it. If you have a moment in time that is causing you pain or discomfort, I invite you to revisit it with a different set of filters or lenses. Change your point of view so to speak.

This time with you look back I invite you to think of the statement hurt people hurt people. Ask yourself without judgement but curiosity, “What would cause someone to say or do something like that?” “Why would a reasonable rational person behave that way?”

When you remember that hurt people hurt people and you realize the comment made had nothing to do with you and everything to do with them and their pain, you are more likely to see it in a different way. You truly are able to change your past one ripple at a time.

You can heal the pain from your past and watch the healing ripple out into your future. You have the ability to change your past and your future at the speed of thought.

You create your life one thought at a time. I invite you to start thinking about things differently. The struggles of today are building the muscles for tomorrow. You can do hard things. You can make a difference one decision at a time.

It would be my pleasure to gift you a copy of my book Bully Proofing You: Improving Confidence and Personal Value from the Inside Out. All you need to do is go to www.bullyproofingyoubook.com

Let’s heal some people this Easter weekend.

13 Apr 2019

Heaven Sent

It’s Saturday 1:30 in the morning and I’m in my sewing room mending a pair of my favorite Rock Revival jeans and my husband’s long-sleeved black shirt from the Dragon’s Tail.

“Why?” You ask. With one eyebrow raised and a slight curve to your lips.

“Good question.” I reply with a heavy sigh. “Ellie ran away again last night while I was sitting in my car speaking with Laurence about a break through I had at my Storytelling Workshop.”

I remember her coming out into the garage when I pulled in. She gave me her customary greeting. She usually says “Hello” on the way to the front yard to relieve herself. She also comes back in to get her expected treat.

When said treat was not delivered in a timely manner, she went looking for a delicious morsel from someone else in the neighborhood.

I was still on the phone with Laurence processing what I learned and how I was going to apply it. I totally forgot about Ellie and her ever hungry stomach.

I got out of the car and realized my mistake. I collected her leash and headed down to the neighbors to get her while still conversing on my phone.

She wasn’t there. She wasn’t anywhere. I looked. I called. I asked people.

Nothing.

So, I came home and prepared dinner. Ate dinner. Cleaned up dinner. Went out and called for her from the back porch and then the front. All while still deliberating and pondering the new information with Laurence.

I don’t know about you but when I go through powerful shifts, I get a headache and then very very tired. I just wanted to go to bed but I was worried about Ellie.

I checked my weather app to see how cold it was going to be. Thirty-two degrees but not until 5 am.

I decided to go to bed, set my alarm for midnight, get up, and see if she had found her way home.

At 12:04 am, I was standing on my front porch in my pajamas looking for my dog who wasn’t there. I checked the back porch at 12:08 am.

Nothing.

“I’m going back to bed.” I grumbled. “At least it is still over forty degrees. I’ll call the shelter in the morning and see if they have her.”

I returned to bed but not to sleep.

I might as well get up and be productive, I thought to myself.

I looked at my phone. Answered a couple texts from my kids. Called them because they work nights and have joined the vampire schedule.

Looked out the windows one more time hoping to see Ellie.

Went back to my bedroom and saw the two items I had laid out for repair.

“I might as well fix those. That’s productive.”

When I’m alone, I talk to myself. I’m not sure why but I do. Do you?

I gathered up my pants and Laurence’s shirt and headed to the sewing room. I set down and decided to work on my pants first because the machine had light blue thread already loaded. I prepared the patch, pinned it in place, sewed it, made sure it would hold, and then set it aside.

As I looked up from my work, my eyes came to rest on a plaque my mother had given me some time ago. She crafted it from a card she had given me. My thoughts turned to her and how much she had loved to sew and make little crafty things as she called them.

I lovingly ran my hand over the machine she had once owned thinking of all the cloths, gifts, and household items she had created with it. I felt closer to her and lost all at the same time.

The thoughts and emotions from earlier in the day came flooding back and I started to cry. I hung my head, let the tears roll down my cheeks, and drop on my penguin PJs.

I looked at the sewing machine once again.

“What’s that?”

There was something white sticking out from under the machine.

I lifted my head, wiped my tears off my face, and onto my pajamas. Then I reached for the object and pulled it out. It was a piece of white card-stock paper used in scrap-booking. It had the words Heaven Sent printed on it.

I have no idea how my mom was able to put that powerful message right where I would find it in my hour of need. But, she did. That’s what Mom’s do. They take care of us even after they’re gone from our sight.

I have no doubt that there are angles among us.

If you have lost someone and your heart is breaking wide open because you miss them so much, I’m here to let you know they are with you. They are protecting, loving, and guiding you still. You may not be able to see them but they’re there. I promise.

How do I know?

My mom delivered me a message and it transformed me.

28 Mar 2019

Who’s Your Lighthouse?

Suicide is at an all time high. The shooting of our children while they are in a school is an atrocity. Our schools use to be safe havens. They were a place of learning, friendship, growth, and development. Now, parents wonder if their children will come home, wind up in the emergency room, or a body bag. Students are afraid to to go to school; because, it means pain, suffering, and possible death.

We can change that. We can make a difference. We can be lighthouses helping others through the storms and dangerous waters of today. We can make sure that everyone sees the light if we all shine bright.

I am a lighthouse. I guide people to their dreams. I make sure they can navigate the course set before them. I shine so others can find their way. I am a beacon of hope and love to those that are lost. I help people Tame the Bully Between Their Ears so they can live their legacy. So, they can fulfill their dreams. So, they can be lighthouses for others; because, this world is in crisis. This world needs more hope, faith, and love.

I can help. Please, help me connect with others to stopping bullying. Search your contacts and put me in touch with those that need help, together we can turn on our beams of hope, faith, and love. Together we will shine a beam so bright it will cut through the darkness and touch everyone. No one left behind.

Contact me now let’s get this training started in as many places as possible. We have already lost to many lives to the effects of bullying.

Thank you for helping me make a difference,

18 Jan 2019

You Don’t Have To Struggle To Be Successful

You don’t have to struggle to be successful.

“What?” You ask. Well, at least you think that if you’re like me.

When my mentor first told me this years ago, I rejected it. I didn’t believe it at all. Now over the last few months, that seed he planted is starting to take root. It’s just a little delicate thing right now but I hope to tend it and let it grow into a powerful source in my life very shortly.

You may be in cognitive dissidence at this moment. You may be saying, “No, struggle means hard by it’s very definition.”

If you look up struggle in the dictionary it says, “1. make strenuous efforts to overcome an adversary. 2. proceed with great effort.”

So, you would be right. I know; now, you’re really confused. Stay with me here.

My new mentor explained things to me in a different way. She said the struggle comes from the emotion I attach to the effort.

It took me a moment at well.

It finally fell into place yesterday. Let me explain.

Let’s say I’m at the gym lifting weights. I’m curling the 20 lbs. dumbbell. I’m grunting and groaning with my face all contorted in the pain and effort. You might look at me and say, “Oh my gosh! She is working really hard.” To which I would agree, and I would feel good that you saw my struggle, recognized it, and gave me the gold star on my forehead I so desperately wanted. I wanted you to feel that way about what I was doing. I wanted you to give me credit for working “so hard”. I wanted your sympathy.

What if I was standing there lifting the 20 lbs. dumbbell with no outward sign of struggle? Would you think I was working hard or just goofing off? Most people would think I was just slacking and should lift more weight. You certainly wouldn’t give me gold star for my “struggle”.

Unless you asked me, you would have no idea how hard I was really working.

I was so addicted to the gold stars from people that I made everything a struggle. I wanted people to think I was strong because I was dealing aka lifting so much. I wanted recognition for my struggle. In fact, I think I wanted the acknowledgement more than my success. Powerful realization.

Now, I am working on staying calm and focused on what I want and not worrying what others are thinking about it. I know how hard or easy it is. I know what I am creating. I know what my future will look like.

I don’t want sympathy. I want success. How about you?

Have a fantastic day,

23 Dec 2018

Merry Christmas from America

Merry Christmas,
After church today, my husband and I went to Mi Rancheto for lunch. We had the pleasure of Viktor waiting on us. Viktor is a very friendly and happy person, so I enjoy sitting in his section.

On an earlier visit with my son, Viktor commented on Max’s watch. It had an American Flag on the face. Viktor stopped what he was doing to tell us how much he loved America. How proud of the fact that he was an American. You could see it in his face as he lit up with his message.

I told my husband about my experience with Viktor from the previous month. As we were leaving, I told Viktor I remembered him and the stories he had told my son and I. He was excited and told us even more.

What a blessing it is to meet someone from another country that loves America. We have so many blessings that it is easy to forget them. The fact that I get to marry whomever I want. The fact that I get to worship whomever I want on the day of my choice. I fact that I can work from home with my dog at my feet. The fact that I can have more than one child. All of these are blessings we receive from being an American.

I know many of my readers are from other countries. I know you have blessings as well. You also have things to be grateful for. I know my country is going through a test of the resolve of our forefathers. I hope it makes it through intact.

I hope we can come together and be united instead of fighting. This Christmas season I invite you to put aside your differences and look for the things in common. I invite you to lead with love for your fellow man. I invite you to give the gift of peace to your community. I invite you to heal some of your pain.

Together we can make things better.

I wish you a Merry Christmas and I hope you have a wonder filled New Year and beyond.

05 Dec 2018

I Love My Life!

I recently had the pleasure of being interviewed on a podcast. This has happened many times before. However, this time was special. When we were done with the interview, they asked me to write an article for their magazine and be on the cover next month. Happy birthday to me. I wanted to share the podcast and the article. Next month I’ll share the magazine interview and the cover.
https://view.joomag.com/planmeetrepeat-premier-issue-book-meet-repeat-premiere-issue/0066264001543466406