Have you ever had a yuck berry? I have had so many and they keep popping up. What’s a yuck berry? Thank you for asking. Let me explain further.
I got confronted recently by a stranger that was going through a hard time. How did I know they were going through a hard time? Because I have read the book Bully Proofing You: Improving Confidence and Personal Value from the Inside Out and in there is talks about how people lash out, not because of you, but because of where they are. Because they had yuck berries for breakfast, lunch, and maybe even dinner. They had something bad happen to them they didn’t understand so they wrapped it in an emotional charge, put a “be cool” shell around it, and filed it away in their mind to trip over later. Let me give you an example.
You might of noticed I like hats. When I was younger, my mom would put a hat on me. I’m 6’ and she is 5’ 3”. She told me it gave her a place to focus on so she could quit looking up. “It gives you a top.” She’d say. I did not know that some people hate hats. It took me by total surprise recently. I could understand if it was in your way at a play or movie theater. I always try to remember the people around and behind me if I am wearing a broad brimmed hat.
Hats are fun to buy, to wear, to chase in the wind, to find the perfect outfit for, to enjoy. Not so with everyone. I was told to take my hat off that is was the stupidest thing anyone had ever seen. Once I recovered from my shock, I said, “Thank you, can you tell me what my hat did to offend you so I can reprimand it?” Once she recovered from her shock, she told me of how she had purchased her first hat in Macy’s and as she was leaving the store she received a phone call. Her father had died in an accident. It devastated her. She never wore the hat. In fact, she had grown to hate hats and people that wore them. She passed a huge yuck berry that day and I didn’t create one. All in all it was a great day.
They next time something bad happens to you just say, “I’m so glad I didn’t have yuck berries for breakfast.” And let it go. Let them pass. Let the emotion move through you so it doesn’t get lodged and grow into something ugly and controlling.
It’s okay to cry. It’s okay to show all kinds of emotion. I use to bottle it up. Lord help you if you were around me when I burst a yuck berry. The more you stuff the bigger they are when they pass or the more controlling they become.
I don’t know if she has bought a new hat yet but I do know that her friends can now ware them around her. Baseball has an entirely new meaning to her now.
Pick one of your yuck berries and get rid of it. It’s time to plant something new.
Have an uplifting day,
PS The name “yuck berry” came from Blair Singer my mentor.