Author: Jeanie Cisco Meth

Our beliefs lead to our feelings, and our feelings lead to our actions. Our actions lead to our habits, our habits lead to our lifestyles, and our lifestyles lead to our destinies. It all starts with our beliefs. Think about what you believe about yourself, the world, other people, opportunities, money, politicians, your parents, etc. When you question your beliefs, you open the door to new possibilities. You examine where you are and where you are going. If you never question or check in with your feelings and habits, you are on autopilot and you may not be going where you want to go.

When you are run by habits, you no longer control your trajectory. Your habits do. When I first heard the saying that you create your habits and then your habits create you, I didn’t know what it meant. After I pondered it and rolled it around in my consciousness, I understood. If I do something for a while, then I no longer think about it. I just continue doing it. For example, most of us are in the habit of brushing our teeth every day, twice a day. We reap the rewards of no cavities. If we forget to brush once in a while, we might need some fillings, depending on our teeth and whether we had fluoride growing up. However, if you don’t brush your teeth, you will have cavities and crowns, and maybe even need false teeth. Brushing your teeth is a little thing, or so it seems, but this habit affects your health. You don’t get cavities overnight. You don’t have pain the first time you skip brushing your teeth. You can go for some time without even knowing there’s a problem. Then one day you wake up with a toothache. When you look back at your habits, you realize that you created the toothache.

It’s the same with your life. You have created where you are right now by following your habits. The question is whether your habits have gotten you what you wanted, or whether you are living with the habits that were handed down to you from your family and friends.

The following concept comes from Bob Proctor, but is in my own words and understanding.

The conscious mind is everything in our awareness: what we think about, what we observe, where we make decisions, where we do our thinking, etc. It can process about forty bits of information a second. It filters the information coming in and keeps what you believe. It can accept or reject any idea based on your belief system.

The subconscious mind is the powerhouse inside of you. It runs the body, muscle movement, breathing, digestion, homeostasis, things of that nature. It is also where your habits and emotions are. It has no filters. It accepts new information without judgment. It can process about twenty million bits of information per second. That is five hundred thousand times faster than the conscious mind. It picks up everything. Your conscious mind can’t do that.

Let’s look at an example. You were talking to someone and got a funny feeling. You liked what the person was saying, but something didn’t jive. That was your subconscious mind telling you that the person’s body language and tonality didn’t match the words. Because the subconscious mind can process information so much faster than the conscious mind, it picks up the incongruities. The conscious mind makes the decisions, but the subconscious mind runs your life.

We all have habits that put us on autopilot. Take a moment and think about yours. Do you have good habits and bad ones? What about those habits that are unproductive? What habits should you break? When I took the time to think about this, I realized there were habits that had to go and ones that had to be made. How about you? Choose a new belief and take action.

I was able to tame my fear of heights by learning how to rock climb. (I had a habit of not getting more than two feet off the ground.) I was attending the University of Utah in the fall of 1987. I remember fraternity week like it was yesterday. On my way to class, I walked past the library and did a double take. There was a group of people repelling down the side of the building. It looked scary and exciting all at the same time. Did I mention I tend to be an adrenalin junky? I went over and asked if I could try it. They got me in the harness and explained the voice signals and hand placement. It wasn’t very long repel but I was hooked. I spent four years in the Army and loved the physical and mental challenges. If I hadn’t of taken a chance, I never would have known.

You need to step outside your comfort zone and make some changes from time to time. It may be an entirely new path in your life that you might have missed otherwise.

I want you to put on your thinking cap for this one. Today we’re going to talk about something you may have never heard before. I remember when I first learned this concept and how difficult it was for me to understand. I’m going to put it out there, and I want you to let it marinate for a while in your subconscious. Ready? Okay, here we go.

You decide what you believe about yourself. You decide your self-esteem. You put the dollar amount on your personal value. You are responsible for how you feel about yourself. You’re also responsible for teaching it to your children if you have any.

I know what you’re thinking because I’ve heard many of the excuses before. You can call them reasons if you want, but to me they’re still excuses. Society has blamed your parents, your peers, your boss, your grandparents, your teachers, the abuse you suffered, the fact that someone yelled at you or hurt you for your low self-esteem. I’m here to tell you that is not true. You are responsible.

You choose to believe what others say about you. You listen to negative or positive things people say. You tell yourself, “Yup, that’s me.” That’s all there is to it. After you make the decision, everyone else just validates you. You accept or reject, on a case by case basis, what people say to you. You listen to the people that affirm your already formed belief. You reject anything that does not come into alignment.

I warned you this might be difficult. It doesn’t matter if you have a great personal value or a low one. You have been programed to believe others formed it for you. How does it feel to know that you have control over your personal value? Did you just sit up a little straighter? Did you take a deep breath and pull your shoulders back? Doesn’t it feel great to know that you are the master of your fate and the captain of your life?

You no longer have to march to another’s drumbeat. You hold the keys to your future. You no longer have to listen to the negative internal dialog you feed yourself every day. You can change the record. You can put on a new one.

I know I’ve heard that one before also. “Jeanie, I don’t need a high personal value. I do just fine the way I am. Others have done so much more than I. Others have been through so much worse than I. They need me to help them and put myself last.” No they don’t. They are having their own issues. They need to see you standing in your power and lifting them up. When you stand strong, you can help others be more powerful. When you shrink back, they feel the need to be less also. It becomes a cycle up or a spiral down. You decide.

I want you to make the decision to take care of yourself and your needs. Put on your oxygen mask first, so to speak. Be the example for others. Take care of your front lawn so others can take care of theirs.

That little voice that just freaked out and said, “I can’t do that. My whole world will fall apart.”  You really need to do it. Especially mothers.

I find so many mothers putting themselves last and in the process they raise entitled pain-in-the-ass kids. I know you just want what’s best for them, but they can become demanding, spoiled adults. If they see you taking care of yourself, they will learn how to take care of themselves.

I told you today’s message would be a tough pill to swallow. I also asked you to think about it and try it out. Talk to other people you feel are successful and you want to be like, but remember they are human too.

I love it when people stop by and catch my house untidy or cloths piled up for wash. I know their house is just like mine from time to time. I use to think all my neighbors never had dirty clothes or problems. That’s just not true. People are people and they have problems also. Some troubles are the same some are different. God gave you yours because you can handle them. You just have to believe in yourself.

Stop hiding from your power and strength. Step into and be a light for the world. We need more lights because there is a lot of dark to put them in.

I’m looking forward to seeing your light shine today. Good job. I believe in you! You need to also.

Take care,

I want you to take a moment and think about what you can do and what you have done. Make a mental list of the things that you have learned to do. Yes, you have done many incredible things. Do you know how to talk? How about walk? Maybe you speak multiple languages. Do you know that it takes over seventy-two muscles to speak, depending on the word, and over two-hundred-twenty to walk? You had to learn how to coordinate all of those muscles. There was a time when you didn’t know how. When I asked you to make a list, did you think to yourself, “I haven’t done anything special?” I bet you forgot about walking and talking didn’t you.

What about your hands? Look at them and all the things they can do. There was a time when you couldn’t control them either. There are people with diseases who have lost the control they once had. Be grateful for what your marvelous body can do. Look at it in wonder and experience it with new eyes of gratitude. It is a miraculous vehicle you have been given to experience this spectacular world. Spend sometime today thinking about how amazing you and your body are.

When you are given a compliment say, “Thank you.” Accept what the other person is saying as truth. Let it land. Let it stick to you. If you have a hard time with this, your personal value may be low. Ask yourself why you have decided to diminish yourself and your value to this world. You are valuable and you were placed here in this time in this place for a purpose. Stop playing small. Stop deflecting and pushing away your value.

I challenge you this week to give a complement and accept a complement with no comment back. Talk to your friends and coworkers to let them know what you are doing. That way they understand and support you in what you are trying to accomplish. You want the complement to land on them and stick. Let them know that when you give them a complement you don’t want one back. You want them to just say thank you. Let them know you will be doing the same. You might feel awkward at first. After a while you will feel a shift. You will have a deeper understanding and appreciation for what you are saying and what they have said to you. You will have a deeper connection with them and yourself.

In many ways, we have lost the humane part of our society. You are able to move through your day without interacting or associating with anyone. You can order just about everything online and have it delivered to your home. You can go for some time without speaking to a person and still get everything you need and want. If you do speak with another person, it tends to stay superficial. You become disconnected from your life and everyone in it.

I’m just asking you to reconnect to yourself and others around you. I’m asking you to remember how amazing you and everyone are. Spend sometime this week reconnecting to your incredibleness and raise your personal value. I bet by the end of the week you will feel better and have accomplished more than you thought possible.

Let me know how it goes for you I’m excited to hear about your experiences.

Go have a beautiful day,